Oh, Crappy Day. . .

Have you ever had a day where you just feel like you look like crap? And so you feel just crappy, too?

Today for me is one of those days.

(I realize that this is a frivolous complaint - there are many people out there with much bigger problems. . . Heck, I have much bigger problems that this. . .however, this is the one that I feel like writing about right now)

Getting older really stinks big time. For so many years I never really aged much, always had people comment on how I looked like my teenage daughter's sister, not her mom, or how they couldn't believe that I have 7 kids. My dad is almost 68, and looks younger than most 50-year-olds, so I must have his youthful genes. . . but. . .

Lately I have been feeling like I have been ageing really quickly.

~Like how it is super hard to lose pesky pounds I have gained over the holidays. . .

~Like how my hair is showing more and more gray as it grows out between visits to the salon. . .

~Like how I have less and less of it than I used to. . .

~Like how I have wrinkles on top of wrinkles now. . .

~Like how I have to shake out my sore muscles when I stand after sitting for awhile. . .

~Like how I feel like an Extreme Makeover 'Before' photo. . .

~Like how I think my husband has become a compulsive liar when he tells me how beautiful and sexy I am (and for the record, I have NEVER seen myself as sexy for one single minute). . .

~Like how people I meet are no longer surprised when they hear I have teenagers. . .

~Like how those same people are no longer surprised when they hear I have grandkids. . .

. . . all of it really tells me that I am looking my age.

And then there are the conversations between my friends - some of them women a bit younger than me - about health issues, specifically about peri-menopause. Talking about weight gain, hormonal irritability, and increased/decreased menstrual flow. I don't like talking about that stuff, mayby because I never really felt the need to before, and I certainly don't want to now.

But I know- it is inevitable.

Hey, for sure, everyone ages. Everyone who manages to stay alive, that is :~P So why do I feel so guilty, like I am letting people down - my family, my friends, even strangers - just by getting older?

Makes no sense to me. . .

I should be grateful that I have my health, and I am. . .but. . .

Must be one of those hormonal things. . .

And I'm sure it has everything to do with the fact that there have been a couple other people that I hadn't seen in a while, and had been startled by how much they had aged. . . I just don't want to put any of my friends and loved ones through that trama. . .

So I continue to try to do my best to take care of myself and stay healthy, to

eat healthy (I need to do better at that, for sure!)

exercise (I love to exercise, but I find that I need to stretch better, watch how I move, etc, so I don't hurt myself - rats!)
and I know that I need more rest, but who has time, chasing after kids and grandkids? Today I have them, all day, with no backup from my husband, who works from home, or my teenage daughter, (who home schools)

So mealtimes, carpooling back and forth from preschool (Tanner) and Scouts (Isaac); all up to me today. I know that I have done it before, when I had a whole bunch of little ones

but I was YOUNG then.

But you know what? Today, trying to stay on task, keep to a schedule so that everything can be accomplished, I managed it all OK. I knew just what I needed to do and did so, calmly, without worrying that I was forgetting something important.

Like I had experience doing this stuff.

Because I do!

Lots and lots of Experience.

Oh, crap.

I betcha I have some wisdom now, too. . .